Got my first date from Plentyoffish.com this week. A medical student called Hannah. Seven years younger - I've still got it, baby.
Need to make sure my banter's better than Friday night, mind. Gang of us were out. Mostly old friends but a couple of unfamiliar faces, including an attractive red head. Tried my luck three times.
CHAT-UP LINE ONE
Me: "Hi. Who are you, then?"
Me: "Nice to meet you, Susan."
Me: "Oh, sorry. Bet you get that all the time, don't you?"
CHAT-UP LINE TWO
Group discussion about our most attractive features. This was my attempt to remain aloof:
ARH: "What do you think's my best feature?"
Me: "Definitely not your smile."
ARH (looking round to see if her friend caught what I just said): "Er, right."
Me: "What I meant was…"
What I meant was she had beautiful eyes, but ARH excused herself before I could clarify.
CHAT-UP LINE THREE
Good-looking guy with cravat heads to the bar, so we're side by side once more.
Me: "Hello again."
Me: "Sorry, I just can't think of..."
ARH: "It's fine."
Me: "I'm just a bit socially inept sometimes."
ARH: "I noticed."
With that ARH picks up her handbag and rummages for an unknown item until GLMWC returns with Chernobyl-coloured shots for the group.
At the end of the night everyone exchanges a kiss on the cheek. Take a step towards ARH but she walks straight past, avoiding eye contact.