Pre-Date Call (4 of 7)

I'm going on a date with another blogger - and we're both writing about it. Here's the latest…

Get an email from Rapunzel. Wants me to ring tonight. The dreaded pre-date call.

Make a list of things to talk about in case there's an uncomfortable silence. All the standard stuff: What are her dreams? What's her speciality in the kitchen? And why can't she get a boyfriend?

Try to imagine how she'll sound. I've only seen one picture - but she looks like a right little minx. Bet she's got one of those husky voices - dead sexy.

Send a text asking if I'm alright to call now. Two minutes later my mobile starts vibrating. An incoming call. It's her.

Check my breath - it stinks. Scramble around for a chewing gum, then remember phones don't transmit halitosis.

Chuckle at my own stupidity as I pick up.

"What's funny?" she asks.

"Ah, nothing," I reply.

An awkward hush resonates for a few seconds. Didn't think I'd need my list this soon.

Thankfully she starts yapping away. Can't get a word in edgeways. Pick up a Scottish accent. It's like talking to Mrs Doubtfire.

"What do you mean my voice doesn't match my face?" she queries.

Attempt to lighten the mood with an impression of her. Reckon it goes down well.

We chat about nothing for a while. Turns out we've got quite a bit in common. We both sleepwalk. And hate rollercoasters. And our parents have the same names - Jane and Steve.

She asks about my worst habit.

"Masturbating while on the phone," I quip.

She laughs.

Offer to ring her back so the cost is split. She isn't bothered. I like this girl.

Rapunzel tells me about her Australian housemate. Not happy about her sharing with a fella. Probably snoops around her room while she's out, looking for random rabbits or whatever they're called. No, Crocodile Dundee will have to go once we're courting.

Finally get round to discussing the date. She suggests doing something wacky so we'll have plenty to write about. I've got to choose what we do because it's the man's job, apparently. No pressure.

Eventually say our goodbyes. Realise I haven't looked at my list once.

Begin to wonder why I was so worried about the pre-date call. It's really not like foreplay after all. For a start it lasted well over half an hour.

Now I've just got to come up with a 'wacky' date idea. Need to think sharpish - we're going out next week.

Suggestions on a postcard please…

37 comments:

Grgg said...

Ok, don't get me wrong but...

I KNOW that we'll be reading about your wedding soon...

;o)

p.ham said...

haha i enjoyed the two angle thing. the parents names though are a bit freaky....

she's right, you have to buy drinks on the date otherwise that hour-long conversation won't fare well.

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

You guys are funny. Best blogging idea ever! I think you need to buy drinks for whoever set this date up!


http://lifebeginsat30ty.blogspot.com/

TheUnwashedMass said...

This is a thoroughly amusing undertaking. Reading both your blogs is like being a double agent in the war of the sexes.

I suggest you take her to play miniature golf. And then for ice cream. Or is that too much like you're an absentee father trying to kill his custody day with the kids?

Toni said...

Like everyone else I find this intriguing. I reckon you should take her to a club gig with drinks before and after. Nothing too big, intimate enough that you can leave if the mood suits you. Where will the date take place Liverpool or Manchester?

She is a Scot and after a while we do get a little bored with the tight fisted jokes and the accent impressions, I would definitely avoid talking politics, you can keep Gordon Brown - Scotland doesn't want him back. Scots women generally know how to have a good time but also know what they want. Treat her well and you should do fine.

Moody said...

Bungeeeer jumping !!!! Or skydiving !!! You'll love it

RenRexx said...

Very good results! I actually like your version better, but I think it's only due to the male's point of view. It's funnier, but hers is very detail specific.
Good luck on that date!

The Invisible Seductress said...

Bad visual of of on the phone--laughing--but you guys are cracking me up with this!! Thank you!!

Lexicon said...

it's funny how different two reports of the same conversation are. I'm sure you'll get more kudos if you design the date without outside help :p

The Girl said...

Go Fishy! I agree with Lexicon, you should figure this one out on your own, that way it'll show the real you, unless that's something you don't want to show?

Bamberio said...

Thanks Lifebegins!

So Fishy, are you buying me some drinks then or what? :-)

It's all sounding very promising. I can't wait to see what you come up with for your date...

x

DiaryofWhy said...

I am loving the "What he says; what she hears" aspect of this.

Good luck- I'm hoping for the best, though I will gladly laugh at the worst. :)

Hunter said...

Sounds fun. Good luck!

Petro said...

go skydiving!!! :)

n good luck with everything!

Farila said...

There have been weird kind of weddings.. like people marrying underwater, in skies etc. Is this going to be a blog marriage or what????

Welsh Girl said...

How about a competition? You put up five possible date ideas and we get to vote on it. Highest vote wins...... In fact we should get to vote on EVERYTHING. What you wear, topics of conversation, hairstyle, the works. We could create a monster here. X factor would have nothing on you two.

Kate said...

I'm loving the double-sided story. So far so good then. Still, there's plenty of time for you to mess it all up... :-)

Kate x
http://search-for-the-perfect10.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Love the idea about putting some suggestions up here and letting us vote for them. Of course, that would mean that Rapunzel would also be able to vote, but that's no bad thing :)

Keren David said...

You two are the Jordan and Peter of the blogging world...except we want a happy ending. And no children called Princess and Junior.

Dater at Large said...

I can't figure out where to comment first! I love being able to read both... this idea is brilliant!

I'm a fan of drinks at a bar on a trivia night for a first date. Nothing like a little team work / competition to get the conversation and flirting going.

Rapunzel said...

Fishy, you promised!

Ermintrude has been on the phone. Wants to know what is the meaning of me laughing at your rude talk. Says I've not to go out with you.

Actually what she said was 'Rapunzel, you pretend to be innocent and me and your dad Goliath pretend to believe you.'

I'm pretty sure that's what she meant though.

x

Out of Sync said...

Haha, I am loving the two-sided story, both sides were fantastic.

Well done on lasting "For a start it lasted well over half an hour" on the pre-date call, at least is takes the pressure off a little for the first date.

You Make My Date said...

Omfg, freaking hilarious!! I love reading both your accounts, and the masturbating on the phone line was brilliant! (It was also funny that you apparently promised not to write that she was amused by it). Naughty Fishy!

cleanslate2010 said...

very entertaining post.

maybe you should go roller skating? i went on a fantastic date one time that involved ice skating with my date (and the three kids i used to nanny for!) and then all of us going out for ice cream. it was weird and fun.

Kato said...

Wacky to me is getting drunk and sleeping with each other.

That's just me though...

;)

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

Just don't take her to a cheasy bar with ripped seats. That leaves a lot of room for other options. The pressure's on.
Robyn

Loverville said...

Can't wait to hear more!

I think we need to have a NYC version of this: if you know any guy NY bloggers? Say, mid-30s to early 40s? Send him my way!

ziazitella said...

Hey, stud, pretty sure she'd noticed if you stole a first date idea from your comment section. Might need the thinking cap for this one.
Or just slyly have the ideas sent via email...

Ca88andra said...

Dinner for sure - and make sure you pay!

Dating Diva said...

That image is breathtaking. lol.

I love reading both of your versions. Funny stuff!

Snafugirl said...

You both seem to have similar humor and I love to get to read both sides. Keep them coming!

David said...

roflcakes I love this shit!

JennyMac said...

I vote skydiving.

And loved your Mrs. Doubtfire comment. So funny.

jo said...

i LOVE reading bout both sides of the story :)

Zach said...

This is great, sounds like you are gonna have a blast!

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