The Blog Divorce (7 of 7)

Bad news folks - it's over. The strain of courting in the public eye finally got to me and fellow blogger Rapunzel.

After a long argument chat last night we decided that because I don't want to spend a fortune on petrol of the distance between Liverpool and Manchester, and the fact we're both at different places in our lives right now, there's no way this could end in anything serious.

The frustrating thing is, we do get along great. I'll probably never be able to listen to Three Times a Lady without thinking of her silly knife and fork earrings. And she'll no doubt always wonder how small my tiny nipples really are.

Obviously we're going to stay friends because I'm clinging on to a forlorn hope she might let me bone her. And we're already planning some joint blog adventures as we continue our search for Mr and Miss Right.

58 comments:

Scarlet said...

well now this sucks.... Tho it does mean I can volunteer for testing the mints now ;)

Anonymous said...

Aaaaaw and we had so much hope for you both. Big shame. You´d better stick to looking closer to home (to save on the petrol bill), what are your neighbours like?

Kato said...

Well this is most disappointing. That really sucks Fishy, and I am sorry.

The least she could do is let you bone her. Sheesh.

Toni said...

I agree with Kato, the least she could do is let you bone her. She obviously has no regard for how this reflects on Scottish hospitality. I would like to hear why you both decided there was no future in it. I hope it wasn't down to the Oz flatmate or the concierges. Anyway, at least it saves you having to spring for a meal on Valentines day. Perhaps you could try Birkenhead - its years since I was there but I don't recall the girls being very fussy

Wynn said...

Too bad it doesn't work out for you both. Maybe some day :D

Another Face, said...

Bad luck Fishy, hopefully your sweetheart will be met in real life though..

On the plus side you are getting closer :).

Kitty Moore said...

Oh no - I had such high hopes for you both!

Kitty x

TheUnwashedMass said...

Divorce? Is it our fault? What did we do wrong? The strain of living in the public eye? We'll close our eyes, I promise! Don't you love each other anymore? Don't you love US!?!? etc.


http://theintermittentsprocket.blogspot.com/

Snafugirl said...

This sadens me so

Kate said...

Aw Fishy this is tragic. I feel like throwing a tantrum and telling Rapunzel she's not my real mother.

By the way off topic reply to my email damn it!

Kate xx
http://secretofficeconfessions.blogspot.com

That Gal Kiki said...

I wondered where my mints disappeared to.

Little Sophie said...

aaawh....

If it makes you feel any better: I liked your side of the story more.
No offence to Rapunzel, but you're funnier.
And we (the public eye) sincerely apologise for breaking you two up.
xo

http://littleprincesssophie.blogspot.com

Ash said...

No, no, no.. Even after those two wonderful dates? I don't wanna believe it :(

Keren David said...

Very much hoping this is just a sham divorce and you will continue dating without the glare of publicity - like Prince William and Kate Middleton. If not, never mind - Rapunzel we are all sad for you!

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

But...but...but...*throwing temper tantrum*

Maybe take up a petrol collection? Kind of like charity for dating distance bloggers?

Lottie said...

=( Oh I feel depressed now

thought you 2 where great

Lottie x

RenRexx said...

i feel like you're sabotaging every opportunity you get. nevertheless, it was fun to get a look into this dating experiment. gave us all quite a few laughs.

i hope you can continue on your quest just as humorously.

(Sebastian is 27 by the way. What brought on about the question? Was it the FPS game?)


-Renrexx.blogspot.com

Gabby said...

"And she'll no doubt always wonder how small my tiny nipples really are."

No she won't, Fishy. That's how we girls can be: outta sight, outta mind - that includes your nipples (freakish as they sound).

Next...

Nandoism™ said...

Amazingly brilliant! I'm so glad I won't be the only one alone for Vday!
Cheers mate--and I too will be wondering about your tiny nipples.

Lisa Marie Miles said...

You still have a few days til Valentines!

Sarah said...

I'm bummed.

The Girl said...

Awwwww =(

Estranged... but not for long said...

Well that's made a rubbish day even more rubbish :-( I enjoyed reading both sides of your love story.

*sigh* going to have to get a life of my own now!

Claire said...

Liverpool and Manchester aren't THAT far away from each other [Wigan Lass here]!

Valentines day is shit overpriced and over rated anyway, even for us married folks.

I still think you should try dating the petshop girl, I think you'd be perfect, low maintenance and FREE things for Mildred.

Sparkless said...

Oh well, you love looking for love better than finding it anyway.

Beautiful but Grumpy said...

That's a shame. But al least we had a glimpse of your beautiful hands ;-)

Poetry and Pornography at www.datinglondonrealstories.com

Kelly said...

I agree with LifeBeginsat30...I will donate to the petrol collection if that's the main issue. Oh well, it was fun for us while it lasted...sniff.

Kathryn said...

Aw. Valentine's Day isn't a real holiday, anyway. (That's what I tell myself, anyway.) If they still deliver the mail, then it isn't real. We are therefore entitled to completely ignore it and instead focus on the fact that it's also Chinese New Year....a much spiffier (yet less romantic)holiday.

Not that V-day is a holiday....'cause it's still not...

There's always a million reasons not to do something said...

You should totally consider doing a "win a date with fishy for v-day" contest...I think you would have a lot of positive interests :)

Lou said...

Oh dear Fish, you're one of the valentines people. I know i should have guessed because you write a dating blog but jeez. Valentines day? Really? *shakes head*

Nope- i don't believe this divorce! I bet you'll continue to chat and meet up but just won't blog about it. The pressure was too much for you guys. Shows you'll make crap celebrities if ever you got the chance!

I'm sure you won't be alone for V-day after all, Fish. Don't worry. Chin up my friend. Chin up. :) x

Kate said...

Booooooo.

Rapunzel's obviously a Lionel Richie hater. Or you did something bad that you're not telling us about....? ;-)

Shame. I loved reading about your dates with Rapunzel.

Kate x
http://search-for-the-perfect10.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Opulently I assent to but I dream the list inform should acquire more info then it has.

Meghan16 said...

Aww, what a shame. Well, V-day is really over-priced anyway :P

Out of Sync said...

Aww that's such a bummer, it really looked like there could of been something worth keeping! If I were you though, I wouldn't let something like this slip away so easily.

Relationships imply sacrifice, a little travel here and there is surely worth it?

Anonymous said...

Nooooooooooo.

Oh wait. This means you're free? Well hell yes! :)

Your admirer north of the 49th parallel.

Chrissy said...

Bummer, Fishy. Next!

Farila said...

Aaawwwww..... Better luck next time.

You Make My Date said...

Nooo! This is worse than when my parents divorced....Probably because I was rooting for you guys more than them :(

http://youmakemydate.blogspot.com/

Dating Diva said...

Oh I am so sad! It sounded like it was going so well. :(

Alaina Rose said...

Just come on over to Kentucky! ^_^ No mints though... I read about those!

jo said...

aww... i was starting to really enjoy these lil his and her posts. darn long distance.

p.ham said...

will go and wimper in corner now.

clo said...

Awww...It looked like it would actually work.
I'm sorry that's such a shame. I was rooting for you two. At least you're still friends :)

Lexicorro said...

That's a shame, you guys get on great. Blog related dates seem to the way forward. the previously mentioned 'win a date with fishy' sounds a great idea.

Oughta Say No said...

Ahhhhhhh! So sad to hear it. But I'm glad you two will keep up with some joint posts. Long distance relationship suck!

Hunter said...

And the blog goes on...

I was worried you'd fall in love and quit blogging.

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

It's over? But I was just getting into it! You can't stop. Get back together immediately.

Luke said...

Hairdresser >>> Rapunzel!

Anonymous said...

gr8 publicity stunt tho

little miss angry said...

OH NO!!! :(

Confessions From A Working Mom said...

Your blog is crazy funny! I have a question though... what does it mean when you say, "the gutting thing is"??? It's getting lost in translation.

Thanks for stopping by today! I also watch Seinfeld re-runs late at night!

~Elizabeth
Confessions From A Working Mom

Welsh Girl said...

It was making her switch from Grey's Anatomy to Question Time that did it. Never ask a girl to choose between a mere mortal (even one as fabulous as you) and McDreamy / McSteamy.... Live and learn fishy...

Dater at Large said...

I told you so... but I shouldn't gloat, the same thing just happened to me (although I was the only one writing). Still, it's sad. Any chance you're still dating in secret?

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

Sorry to hear that, but I see that you've bounced back and keep on.
Check out my V-day invite on my blog.
Cheers,
Robyn

Charlene said...

Sorry to hear but I guess all's well that ends well!

Anonymous said...

nice post. thanks.

Anonymous said...

I just had my worst date experience just now. I'm spoilt because I'm used to being flown out of the country for weekend dates, or have a man arrange something "customised" for both of us. So, knowing that I'm spoilt, I give a new guy a lot of breathing room because I don't want to disregard somebody who is genuinely good but who isn't sophisticated or pretentious. Basically, I have been on three dates with this one guy. He's socially awkward, and has a bit of hyperactivity, due to a genetic condition which does not impact on his intellect whatsoever. So, I ignore the physical issues and pay attention to his inner person. When I'm talking to him, he seems sensitive and kind. Between dates, there is no contact. He is a bit Asperger's so is focused on work, very rigid about certain things, so I know that at the end of the work week he is looking forward to contacting me, and so I planned a romantic surprise for him. I dressed up in an outfit that I knew he would admire (a bit conservative, a bit tarty); had my nails done; wore his favourite accessories; ordered a gourmet meal for him at my favourite bistro. All of this I planned and arranged a week in advance of this evening. When he called me, I had just finished my meal, sipping red wine while enjoying dessert. His call was right on time, to the minute. My plan was for him to invite himself, and then when he showed up and, ta-da, there's supper. I knew it would put a smile on his face. It would flatter him, and make him feel special. As I predicted, he offered to show up there. He lives 3 minutes away by car, so when 20 minutes pass and I don't see him, I was taken aback, and so was the chef. After 30 minutes, I paid the bill (to the chef's protests) and called a cab. Forty-five minutes later, I was in a taxi. He didn't show up until 10 minutes after I got home, so he was 50 minutes late. Oh, and guess what, when he showed up at the restaurant and I wasn't there, he didn't phone me to find out where I was. He just sat there and ate his gourmet meal, which I paid for! You're welcome you scumbag. I was even more surprised when the hostess called me to apologise for his rude behaviour and to tell him off in front of me, because he said, "Oh, sorry." To her! All the while gorging on the delicious supper the chef had prepared for him. I told her, in a rage, that some men can never appreciate a good woman because they're too busy looking upskirt, feeling bottoms and ogling titties and because they are so stupid and only want a woman with jerkoff potential, and are unsophisticated, immature and insecure, they don't know when someone genuinely likes them and wants to accept them as they are. So, how can this idiot be allowed to get away with such disgusting behaviour? It's been two hours and he's still enjoying his free dinner. No thank-you e-mails. Dummy.

Jonathan said...

Very interesting dating experience of yours with a doctor ! Cool !